iggandfriends

Life, crafty stuff, long walks, thoughts, and little oddities.

Usefulness and wooden pigs

13 Comments

I’ve just finished doing the last two things in my diary – leading a couple of retreats. There is nothing else written in it. It is a complete blank. Nothing I have to do for anyone else. In some ways that is a wonderful freedom. In other ways it raises questions in my mind. One thing I’ve been reflecting on recently is how my sense of worth, of being valuable, is connected to being useful, to doing things for others. At the moment, on this year out, I don’t feel particularly useful. I’m not doing any pastoral work, or preparing services, or teaching about creative worship, or any of the hundred other things I used to do. There is a guilt factor in not being involved.

We’re very much taught by this world in which we live that our value is judged by our usefulness, by our productivity, by what we contribute to society. And my year out to reconnect with God is counter-cultural. Most people initially assume I’m going to go and do some charity work, overseas somewhere. Or that I have a great agenda of things to achieve. This would be normal. Targets and deadlines, doing good. Yet while I’m hoping to do some writing ( I have a couple of books underway), and some more artwork, they will be an added bonus. I’m trying to be, not to do. Trying to conquer my self-induced guilt when I sit and watch the tide come in and tide go out again. Allowing myself to appreciate the wind in my hair, the warmth of the sun on my face. Toasting bread on an open fire. I’ve been spending some of my time crocheting a nativity set. I could say that it’s good as it keeps my hands occupied while I think. But I’ve just been enjoying doing it. They’re fun. I was giggling at one of my shepherds who keeps falling over (I think he’s been at the whisky), and found myself apologising for it. One of my parents came out with a revealing comment ‘you are allowed to enjoy yourself’.

shepherd and sheep

It was an important lesson. I am allowed to enjoy myself. I do not have to be useful to someone at the same time. I do not have to be earnest and productive. I can just be and rejoice in just being. On a walk earlier today I passed one of the older buildings in Port William. It used to be the old slaughterhouse, and the owners have been gradually renovating it over the last year or so. In the garden, there is a herd of wooden pigs (ok, that’s slightly gruesome. A warped sense of humour at work). Just for fun. No other reason. Something that has no monetary purpose, no great artistic message, nothing useful. Yet it makes you smile as you pass by.

Sometimes, God just wants you to enjoy life. He wants you to enjoy being in his company, and he wants to enjoy your company. When you are not rushing around, or busy with other things. He doesn’t want you to earn his love, for he loves you anyway. No matter whether you are doing something ‘useful’ in the eyes of society or not,  you are beloved and wanted and adored by him. Full stop.

A herd of wooden pigs

Watches me as I pass by

Eyes seeming to follow me.

I wonder,

Do they come alive at night?

Under the sound of the waves,

Do they grunt and snore?

Do they trot about,

Looking for food?

Or for someone to scratch their backs?

Or are they just content where they are?

Watching the tide

Listening to the wind

Enjoying life,

By the sea

Contented pigs.

wooden pigs, port william

The pattern for the shepherds can be found on : 6icthusfish.typepad.com . The sheep is my own design and when I get round to it I’ll type up the pattern! NB 5  Dec 12 done it!  https://iggandfriends.wordpress.com/crochet-patterns/

More information on the wooden pigs can be found here: http://www.rtby.com/project.asp?7

Advertisements

Author: iggandfriends

Taking time out to ponder life and everything else. This is the space where I press the pause button on my busy life to reconnect with God, to re-energize, and focus on my creativity. Time out to blow bubbles, walk on the beach, write some stuff, do some needlework, and generally enjoy life once again. You can view my main blog at www.iggandfriends.wordpress.com. I also have another blog at www,faithinthehome.wordpress.com, and a arty/crafty one at http://52weeksofcreations.wordpress.com/. I hope you enjoy visiting :)

13 thoughts on “Usefulness and wooden pigs

  1. So strange – just got off the phone with a friend in Boston who is a mother of five and grandmother of many. She works full-time, takes time every weekend to spend with family and friends, is one of the most thoughtful people I’ve ever known, and says to me today, “I don’t think I’m doing anything useful.” Good lord. Let me assure you, though we’ve never met, that you are valuable just as you are right now – even doing nothing, and perhaps doing nothing itself is a great gift! Contemplation is greatly undervalued in this culture, and I think that a shame. Loved you poem, by the way 😉

  2. We are allowed to enjoy every minute of this wonderful life …. As for doing nothing, well, sometimes I feel The Lord would like me to do nothing … Just offer him empty hands …

  3. I wish I could take off a year and contemplate too, the busy life gets old pretty fast, lol

  4. As a fellow pastor, I will hold your sabbatical time in prayer. I love your picture of the pigs, and thinking about them enjoying the water. Makes me want to splash around too.

  5. I love the nativity set! You’ve inspired me!

  6. thank you for this post! would love to know how do you get over the ‘guilt’ feeling that we ‘ought’ to be ‘doing’ something?!?!

  7. Pingback: Manic | Laptop on the Ironing Board

Please feel free to leave a comment. I love to hear from you :)

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s